So, there I was. A fugitive. A vigilante. A man (are you a man when you’re nine?) with nothing but himself and his Pokemon to trust. I bicycled all the way out of the city and came down to a tunnel. It would not let me enter without removing myself from my bicycle so that’s exactly what I did.
This tunnel seemed strange. It was well lit, and trainers stood there, motionless, all waiting for a shot at me. So, I let loose Charmander. …. Can you say disco inferno? They can’t (they’re badly burned, if you didn’t get the implication… If you didn’t get it you’re really an idiot. Hell, even a Cool Trainer could have gotten that!) I feel that I have gotten more violent ever since my run in with “R-Man”. This is what I have started calling him, seeing as how he wasn’t wearing a name tag at the time.
So, through the Underground tunnel I went, battling no trainers along the way. Why would I have to!? They’re all badly burned! Or so I thought. Then, I saw him. The light- Wait. No. That’s a Bug Maniac. Anyways, I decided to defeat this little snot with fire. So, Charmander had some more bodies to burn.
… Charmander was immediately put to sleep. Apparently, it only starts to get ruthless and blood-thirsty when it turns into a Charmeleon. Although, I’m not to sure if that’s ever going to happen seeing as how it keeps getting incapacitated! I wanted it to evolve, I needed it to evolve. So, I did what a natural born warrior would do in this situation.
I slapped it repeatedly until it woke up. Although, it didn’t wake up right away. It evolved (apparently, PokeEvolution is closely related to violence!) I had my very own Charmeleon! A Charmeleon that was asleep (thanks a lot Bill Darwin….) So, out went the blood thirsty Doduo, although, it wasn’t nearly as murderous. I don’t know why, but Doduo wasn’t picking up on my homicidal tendencies. The Bug Maniac, and his Butterfree, both laughed in my face. Again, went out the slap of fate….
I have a Dodrio now. I screamed at it, but it poked me and went back into it’s ball. I don’t know why it won’t listen to me. I’ll have to look it up in the Pokepedia later. Letting out my Rhyhorn, we crushed the Butterfree!
Rhyhorn and I emerged from that tunnel as men (which is odd, cause Rhyhorn is female) that day, and in to Vermillion City…
Cyan Gitors
PS: If anyone knows this pansy, Cool Trainer Andrew (Andrea? I don‘t know how to pronounce the squiggle), I would like him to know that his challenge is hereby accepted. I will crush that little mother fucker like a bug, and then spit on his face. Wow, I just used my first curse word…. I don’t know how all this murder is sitting with my system… Ah well…
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